Seven Tips to Reduce Holiday Stress
by Stephen Kolar
The holidays are here! I love this time of year and greatly enjoy time with friends and family. And I also recognize that holidays often come with increased stress. Urgent demands on time, anticipation of the season, traveling, and family fun are all just a few things that can contribute to increased stress during this period. You can reduce your stress during these busy times by adopting a flexible mental approach that helps you adjust to potential stressors while enjoying the good times.
Here are seven tips to help you deal with stress during this time:
- Plan your time but don’t overcommit
Often people feel like they have too much to do and too little time during the holidays. Planning a schedule can help. Prioritize your time so you can do all the things you want to do but do your best to not overcommit. If you are not normally a “scheduler”, then now may be a good time to start. Map out your time and you’ll have a better chance of getting all your fun times in. Look at your schedule and see how much time you have. Are you overcommitted? If running around every day during the holiday season will really stress you out then you may need to adjust your plans. It could help to prioritize what you want to do and remove the more minor activities. You may have to schedule your time so the most vital ones get done (e.g., seeing family) while putting lesser ones at the end if there is enough time (e.g., drive around looking at lights).
- Keep some regular structure that helps ground you
Perhaps you have an activity that gives you structure during non-holiday times or helps you feel rejuvenated. This could be exercise, having some quiet time to yourself in the morning, meditation, or some other chill activity. Try to engage in your calming activity at least a few times during your holidays. Being adaptable is important here as well. For example, you may only get to exercise/meditate/chill two or three times a week. That’s fine! A few times is better than none. (If you are big into your activity -exercise or whatever- and want to do it everyday then I recommend trying to be comfortable with only a few times during a big week of activity.)
- Manage expectations and have a flexible and adaptable mindset
The holidays are fun and special. But they won’t be perfect, there will be bumps along the way. Manage your expectations and help your family members do the same. The holidays may bring you unexpected changes to your plans so being flexible and willing to change them is a good idea. Go into each gathering, event, party with the mindset that you’re going to have a good time and go with the flow.
- Remember the holidays are special
Winter holidays come along only once a year. As your stress level increases, tell yourself that this is a special time that you enjoy. The holidays are also a time to remember times past with family and friends, especially those who have passed. Some families find comfort in creating traditions (or continuing old ones) to remember loved ones they have lost during the holidays. This holiday time occurs at the end of the year, so it’s often a good time to look back at the good times of the past year and plan for the next one. If you find yourself feeling stressed and bothered by the holidays, then take a moment to remind yourself how special this time may be to other people who are important to you. This is especially true for the little ones! Most children greatly enjoy the holidays and recognize that they are a special time. Try to adopt their mindset! Your embracing the season can help your children enjoy it, too.
- Relax and cut yourself and your family members some slack
Similar to managing expectations above, try to relax and go easy on yourself and your family members. Help develop this “slack attitude” among your family members and friends. Remember these are people who care about you and with whom you can (hopefully) be your true self.
- Be healthy when you can
Enjoy your time and have fun! Eat well, stay up late, unwind. But try to get at least a decent amount of sleep or give yourself breaks to rest. And eat well but don’t overindulge the whole time. Get some physical exercise if you have the time.
- Recognize if the holidays are hard for you and take steps to deal with them
Sometimes the holidays can bring up painful emotions whether these are related to family conflict, loss of loved ones, or reminders of difficult times. Seek out help from loved ones who are supportive. I would recommend accepting that these difficult feelings are present first and then trying to deal with them. Bottling up negative emotions can be unproductive and can lead to one dreading the holidays every year. And seek out a therapist if needed.
Embrace the holidays – they will be over soon!
(Note: The holidays sometimes lead to increased feelings of depression or anxiety. If you have increased depressed on anxious feelings during this time, then seek support from those you are close to or find a therapist. If you are feeling unsafe, then tell your support people AND call 911 or the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.)